1. “So, since you are moving up a level this year, are you going to need that new double bridle you were talking about?” I realize that none of us know the difference between a single, double or triple bridle, but this is guaranteed to send her off into another realm of leatherwork, bits, and other various pieces for at least 20 minutes in which you can check out again.
2. “Do I need to get the truck and trailer serviced?” This one is doubly good. For once you may get a straight “yes” instead of the usual discussion of the aforementioned bits, and two, you will get to escape the barn for at least three to four hours with the truck and go talk to other guys who are sitting in the local quickie lube with their wives cars. You might even be able to make a whole Saturday out of it if it needs tires.
3. “Are there going to be any of those long distance trips this year?” This one is actually very important. These dates are the ones which you can invite your buddies over and have a weekend of beer and sports without anyone telling you that you are too loud, the house is a mess, or that you had one too many beers during the baseball game. If you play it right, even if you trash the house, if you clean it up by the time she gets home on Sunday afternoon, you will be the hero because you cleaned while she was gone.
That is all I have for now. Good luck, and have a great show season. And don’t forget to congratulate her on all of her ribbons that she brings home from the shows, even if you have no idea why.